I’ve been meaning to write this post for a few weeks but I haven’t had time, made time that should say. What I have made time though is hanging outdoor Christmas lights in the frosty weather in my PJS and a hoody at 11.15pm at night all while the neighbours look on in horror. I’ve made time for a mammoth 4 hour wrapping session and nativity costumes being made from scratch because ‘that’s what we do’. I’ve made time for all that. And more.
So what’s this all about? This post? Well it’s about this week or these days. The week and days before Christmas. According to any Hallmark Christmas movie channel, it’s the week where we gladly bustle around village shops and take a break in cosy coffee shops and sup on frothy hot chocolate and watch the snow fall of an evening, while our children sit around the fire playing board games (not iPads people – board games!) and we would admire my Miracle on 34th street style decorations that are dust free and in perfect place.
Now what’s actually happening is that my daughter is watching YouTube videos of toys she wants being unboxed and played with on YouTube because you know why not when Christmas Day is less than a week away, but other than that it’s all a bit manic. Last minutes jobs, visiting everyone in your phone contacts and to boot my house is a shit hole. Laundry is piling up, I mean literally in piles on my bedroom floor. No joke. I haven’t brought a turkey yet and my plan to have prepared and pre baked my mince pies and shortbread has fallen short and Aldi Salted Caramel mince pies have been used instead (shame). I haven’t posted my neighbour cards yet and my house is still missing a few decs I’m pretty sure.
Now I’m not going to write this blog and say ‘let it all go’ or ‘screw the turkey buying- get a Maccies on Christmas Day and throw some cranberry sauce on it and relax’ because 1- ewww and 2- that’s not what I want to do.
I want to do it all.
I want to have the perfect tidy house. But not just tidy, I want to have organised kitchen cupboards so it’s easier on Christmas day. and because Pinterest tells me I should. I want to have my coat rack sorted so I’m not throwing coats onto the stairs on Christmas Day. I want to have festive movie nights as a family where we all watch Home Alome and the iPad isn’t blaring Fireman Sam along side it. I want to feel on top of it all. I want to feel like a flaming hybrid of Mary Berry/ Nigella Lawson/ Kirstie Allsopp and Mary Poppings. All with the glitter eyeliner that gleams to the stars ala Pixiwoo.
This is when my shit should be together.
This is why I’ve been organised and planned out stuff so I’m on top of stuff. This is why I have 700 lists on the go throughout any day.
I want it all. I need to do it all. I want to do it all. I should do it all.
I have to.
Expect you can’t. And you don’t.
Every friend I talk to, realive I bump into is STRESSED TO SHIT. Whether they are organised people who’s homes never look out of place or whether they are always a bit late and have a home that’s always a tad out of shape. Whether they are the mom of 1 or 5 or the mom who works full time or stays at home. Whether they are the mom who is cooking for 10 or the mom who is making donation runs to charities.
They are all stressed.
All these damn right wonderful women and stressed, and feeling it.
And it’s because of the above.
The wanting to do it all. The feeling like you have to do it all.
And YES, of course they’re are things you have to do. You need to buy a turkey if your cooking a turkey, chances are you prob wanna Hoover before guests come round. You most prob gonna wrap gifts for folks. Yes course. Some of that stuff you gotta suck up and just do.
But you don’t need to do the extras. The total deep cleans, the car sort outs, the offering to dog sit when you can’t, the ‘I’m going to bake 100 mince pies for the festive season because that’s what my Nan used to do’ ideas, the extra visits to Santa, the cupboard organising, delivering your neighbours gifts as their busy. You don’t need to do those things.
There has to be a cut off. A line. Sure have a list of things you HAVE to do. But that’s it….
- buy turkey
- Wrap last gifts
- Visit grandparents
- Collect cake
But this list then cannot continue. I’m realising that isn’t the time of year to add more on. It’s the time to take stuff off.
Ease the load.
It’s so damn busy. And most of it is fun busy yes, but still busy. And busy with toddlers is anyone’s CRAZY busy. Make it easier on yourself Mommas.
Accept you’ll have a dumping ground room/ garage/ cupboard/ wardrobe for December.
Accept you’ll buy mince pies instead of baking into the early hours.
Accept that it’s ok to loop PJ Masks instead of forcing your child to watch Elf so you can just get shit done. Or heck so you can sit down.
Accept it all.
Let go a bit. Just a bit.
Of course do what makes you happy and calm but don’t add to it, don’t weigh yourself down at this time of year.
And don’t ever forget it’s your Christmas too. Your time to relax, feel festive and have a good time. Yes it’s never going to be as relaxing if your the person who cooks or if your not a child etc, but you deserve moments to feel the Christmas vibes.
Decide a few things you really want to do. For you. Not for your house or your kids or your 18 members of family your cooking for. For you.
Fit them in. Or half of them. Or 1 of them. Take off some tasks that, in the grand scheme of Christmas don’t really matter. No ones gonna think Christmas sucked because mom didn’t organise the coat rack. (And if they do then they can eat their Turkey in the garden!!) but you get my drift.
Since before December these are a few of the things I really wanted to do, for me-
- watch the top 5 Christmas films
- Go to a few national trust houses as a family to look at some trees and decs
- Try out some festive green glittery eye shadow looks
- Write this damn blog post
- Have a meal with friends
- Watch Gavin & Stacey with my husband
- Put my feet up and enjoy some quiet time reading my many festive books about village Christmasses (I have issues as I have an abundance of these books!)
And it continues…
and sadly I haven’t done a lot of them. But I have done lots of other things that, yes I am glad I’ve done now but the things I’ve listed above are what make Christmas Christmas for me, and a lovely Christmas at that for me.
And folks, if that’s like it for you too, those are the things you should do.
And after I’ve hoovered tomorrow and brought our turkey and spuds then that is what I plan to do.
Join me. Ease your loud. Don’t add to your list, in fact take stuff off. Enjoy your Christmas. It’s your Christmas too. The coat rack can wait.
Lady Like Momma