I’m afraid this isn’t going to be a uber sensible post of sleep tips, nappy rash or postpartum pains and creams. No, this is my top 10 tips that people don’t really mention. The none heavy stuff. The tips that aren’t printed in your baby books.
1. Dress that baby up.
Yes baby grows are easy. And the first few weeks my baby wore nothing but. Then one day I went to put her in the newborn size beautiful dress someone had brought us, and it didn’t fit. Wait… What? But I want her to wear it… Maybe I can make it fit? Erm nope. Neither baby or you is going to enjoy that process. After that episode I dressed our baby up nearly every day. Because they grow fast. And baby clothes are too cute not to be worn. Worried they’ll ruin them? They probably will a bit, but nothing a washing machine and some Vanish cannot fix.
2. The diet can wait. If you want it to.
Do not feel pressured a week after giving birth to get into your skinny jeans. Or ever. If you want to lose weight after having your little one but don’t feel ready to tackle the challenge yet then It can wait. As long as you eat healthy ish and drink enough fluids (I don’t think wine counts!) then you are ok. Don’t compare yourself to actresses and singers or other Moms you know. As long as you feel ok. Then just relax.
3. Use that carrycot. Or don’t.
A lot of pushchair retailers now sell these beautiful old school looking carrycots that you can use with your pram. I had one. They are lovely looking and comfy for babies. I loved mine. And used it pretty much every day for a long time. Despite people telling me it was easier to use the car seat adaptor. On the other hand I have friends who used their carrycots once or twice, and didn’t get on with it, despite people telling them they should use it as they have brought it after all. So the message is- use it if YOU want, or don’t use it if YOU don’t want to. You’re pushing after all.
4. If you don’t sleep when the baby sleeps then don’t panic.
“Sleep when the baby sleeps” – The most over given advice for new Moms (and Dads). And I honestly think not many parents do. If you manage to do it then great. If not- DO NOT PANIC. My baby used to have some glorious long naps and I would get near the end of her naps and think- SHIT I haven’t been to sleep. And sometimes work myself up because I hadn’t slept. I had either spent the time cleaning or online food shopping (Ok who am I kidding? I was on the Mamas & Papas website for an hour again) or catching up on some reality TV shows. And I would be so worried thinking how am I going to get through the next few hours. Or through the night. And yes, you will be tired. But you WILL deal with it.
5. Take lots of pictures and videos.
We live in an age now where our cameras on our phones are so good that we can take pictures (good pictures at that) at the touch of our iPhone’s. I took lots of pictures. As every new Mom and Dad does. But I would sometimes get the comments ‘more pictures’ or ‘this poor baby doesn’t want a photo shoot today!’. I never took any notice, and I advise you not to either. Because looking back is so much fun (and emotional) and it’s amazing to have such a catalogue of pictures of our babes.
6. You will be scared driving around with baby in the car. At first.
I had never thought about this before baby was here. I did drive more careful while I was pregnant, but I remember when my husband went back to work after 2 weeks and I had to go out in the car. Alone. Baby got strapped in the car seat. I checked it about twenty times. Got in the driver’s seat and set off. And proceeded to drive about 20 miles and hour for the entire journey. I would jump at other cars, shout abuse if someone got close to the back of the car and was generally a nervous wreck. But the good news that it will pass. In a small amount of time. You will still be nervous but more calm.
7. Don’t stress over making new Mom friends.
Don’t worry if when your babies 2 weeks old you haven’t got a hoard of new Mom friends popping around for play dates and Carrot Cake. It takes time. Mom friends can come when you go to baby groups or when friends or family have babies. Or even when you hit the school gates. Please do not stress about feeling you have to form relationships with other new Moms (who you may not even like!) just to feel like you’ve succeeded in getting new Mom friends. It will happen. Don’t forget the best friendships take time.
8. It’s ok to laugh at the awkward moments.
I’m not talking about laughing at the adorable cute moments your baby will provide because that’s a given. I’m talking about the moments when you feel like if you don’t laugh, you will cry. For example- when baby poops on the doctor. When you let go of your pushchair for a second and it begins to roll down the Tesco car park (maybe laugh after with that one. Run first). When your baby has kept you up all night screaming with constipation and finally lets rip- all over your arms, walls and the dog. Those moments. Laugh away. Laugh when you need to. It’s cool. Sometimes it’s the best medicine.
9. Breast Feeding didn’t work for you? That’s ok. Truly.
Before you have a baby you plan everything out. I planned to breast feed. I read all about it, went to the classes, I thought I had it down. It didn’t work for me. Or baby. I tried and tried and then I went onto pumping (seriously anyone who pumps all the time needs a medal!) and it still wasn’t working for us. I was an emotional wreck and felt so guilty for using formula. Until one day the most wonderful health visitor gave me a hug and told me it was ok. She made it clear that the point was I was FEEDING my baby. The relief was huge. Same thing happened to two close friends. It happens. It also happens that you can plan to use formula and think- hey let’s try this breast feeding thing out, and you love it. The point is breast feeding is a fantastic thing to do. Bottle feeding is a fantastic thing to do. Both are true. Never feel guilty for feeding your child. However you chose to do it.
10. It’s ok to gush about your baby. Really.
Gush away. Whether it’s in person, on Facebook, on texts, down the phone or shout if from the rooftops. It’s ok to gush and talk about your baby. It’s your BABY. Your pride and joy. Your little miracle. Your bundle of cuddly gorgeousness. And you will want to talk about them. You will want to share their milestones and how their pooping really well. And surprisingly people will want to listen. Honestly. (Especially you’re Mom!) Just make sure you listen to them to. Especially if they have babies to gush about to. Gush together. Its fun. But never worry that you are talking about your little one too much. You’re not.
And that’s it. My top 10 none serious tips for new Moms and Dads. Hope you enjoyed. And remember get snapping those pics!
Lady Like Momma